so i need a website

project :: build a website
got the domain name
first i tried wix they’re supposed to be easy
i got lost
then my friend said try wordpress it’s got lots of support
i thought to myself i need support
i’ve tried this before and failed
so wordpress it is i’m going in
even though some facebook friends recommended square space
oh well don’t be distracted / focus / you can do this
give them your email address ok
and your domain name uhuh
do you want to host that domain name here or elsewhere ??
you can map the domain name or you can transfer it
log in as a promovisitor and then you can map your change name
i’m lost
password just click the blue bar
‘oops that’s not the right password please try again!’
turns out i have previous accounts with wordpress
monkey two hands and humanstoryprojectorg oh no
what’s my password ?? i forgot / it’s been years
search for passwords in my index cards
you can do this don’t get discouraged
keep the tips of your fingers wet for quick shuffling
thru the hundreds of cards with passwords and usernames
from every fucking kind of digital domain that i’ve ever been involved in
amazon amex google mail to google account to go daddy what is this alphabetical ?? jesus there must be a hundred of them medicare oh yeah there’s a good one
usps youtube paypal facebook
b of a timeless today credit cards iphone itunes instagram
endicia fillz grandecom microsoft
rabbit books firefox
pinterest the new yorker
writer’s and global challenges registration
patreon soundcloud verizon warm showers
give donald trump a dog haha my facebook page
drop box netflix couchsurfing
administrator name new york times lulu
wordpress !! whoa half way thru the catalog i found it

making progress now
ok continue / enter password / type carefully and slowly
stop for a moment appreciate the solemnity of this event
press enter press log in to enter
aaaaaaaaaaagghhh !! ‘oops that’s not the right password please try again!’
i’m hopelessly lost
and so i went struggling thru the slough
hacking my way thru the dense jungle with my dull machete
wild birds and tigers were all around
ok so wordpress sent me a link to log in
they’re reaching out and i appreciate that
the link opens a wordpress advertisement whaaaat ??
and a picture of a beautiful woman walking thru the jungle
what kind of a log in procedure is this ??

ok here we go
but it loops me right back to the same log in procedure
and ‘oops that’s not the right password and please try again!’
ok that was the wrong link on the email to click
the other link takes you to a ‘let’s log you in and create a site’
so here we go lord we’re making progress
i’m walking down the windy road searching for the true light
transfer domain to wordpress
can’t be transferred for 56 days
connect domain without transferring
(they have advertising all throughout their tutorial prompts very annoying)
pick a plan – personal
moving at a nice pace / breathing
credit card
1 year or 3
$48 or $116
hum choices so many choices that’s why i can never get anything done
i’m going in at the low end
yeah i will give me a second
the verification has a nice progress bar
ah !! verified / didn’t take long / they can do that well
that’s what it’s really all about anyways / take the money
transfer the funds / sell you something / ok i’ve got
a big congratulations on my computer screen but
no time to celebrate now i’ve got to keep after it and
see if i can make some progress or will i fail again
it’s an adventure of sorts and instead of tigers it’s frustration stalking me

ok / i now have been invited to ‘view your site’
c’mon in look around the door’s open wow and at the bottom of the page
before i enter my new realm a ‘happiness engineer’
is standing by to help me / i’m in heaven
priority support or just normal ??
and i am advised by an advertisement in the middle
of the page that advertising has been removed
and then it opened up
just like that
a lovely teal and green with a photo
of a cool guy writing on his notebook
with a latte and a press release nearby
must be me

i’m just going to sit here for awhile and rest